What a dildo is
A dildo is a sex toy designed for penetration, usually shaped like a penis but often more abstract. Unlike a vibrator, a basic dildo has no motor: it is used for the feeling of fullness and movement.
Dildos are used by people of every gender and sexuality, alone or with a partner, vaginally or anally. Toys meant for anal use must have a flared base so they cannot slip inside.
They are one of the oldest sex toys in history: carved stone examples have been found dating back thousands of years.
Types and materials
Realistic dildos look like a penis, sometimes with veins and testicles. Non-realistic ones come in smooth, curved or colourful shapes. Some have a suction cup base for hands-free use, and some are designed for G-spot or prostate stimulation.
Body-safe materials are medical-grade silicone, glass, stainless steel and ABS plastic. Avoid cheap jelly or PVC toys, which can contain phthalates and are porous, so they hold bacteria.
Double-ended dildos are designed to be shared, and strap-on dildos are worn in a harness; see our guide What is a strap-on?.
Choosing and using your first one
For a first dildo, choose something smaller than you think you need, made from silicone, with a gentle curve. Size can always go up later.
Use plenty of lube: water-based lube is safe with all toys, but never use silicone lube on silicone toys. Our lube guide explains why. Go slowly, relax and stop if anything hurts.
For anal use, always choose a toy with a flared base, go very slowly and use more lube. Never move a toy from anal to vaginal use without washing it or changing the condom on it.
Cleaning and storage
Wash it before and after every use with warm water and mild unscented soap or toy cleaner. Silicone, glass and steel toys can also be boiled or washed in a dishwasher if the maker says so.
Dry it fully and store it in a pouch, away from other toys, as some materials react with each other.
Our guide to choosing, using and cleaning sex toys and to adult shops covers where to buy safely.
Your questions, answered
What is the difference between a dildo and a vibrator?
A dildo does not vibrate; a vibrator has a motor. Some toys are both.
What is the safest dildo material?
Medical-grade silicone, glass or stainless steel.
Can you use a dildo anally?
Yes, but only one with a flared base, used slowly with plenty of lube.
